I was a Muslim client seeing a white therapist.
Being a practitioner who is a person of colour from a minority background in a majority white field, creating and offering therapeutic spaces to people of colour is an intention I'm mindful of.
At different stages of my life, I knew to seek the help and expertise of those in the mental health field. But - none of them looked like me or came from a similar cultural, spiritual, social or political understanding.
My experiences with these psychologists weren't necessarily negative, but the experiential divide between us - how differently we both moved through the world- meant they weren't always well-fitting or at ease. The anxiety I had from fear of judgement meant I needed to work through more layers on top of the actual issues that needed addressing. Plus, switching psychologists was energy consuming and costly.
I didn't want to self-censor because I worried I'd be affirming some racist stereotype of my cultural background.
I didn't want to have to explain that my family viewed things differently but that it didn't make them inferior or 'less than'.
I didn't want the burden of regurgitating defences against my religious upbringing because I needed to be some good-vibes ambassador to the faith and to the 1.7 billion Muslims around the world.
I didn't want to have to prove that I had a right to a complex, multi-dimensional, individual way of being that is easily granted to any white person who sits here.
And neither should you.
Finding a therapist you can connect with can be hard to find. And this isn't to say you will only feel comfortable with a therapist who shares your background - because heck that too can come with it's own set of pressures. But if you can, find someone who you can have a good and dignified experience with regardless. Someone willing to do the work towards creating that 'safe' space by questioning and educating themselves - on their own time. As a practitioner, I'm hoping to be that too.